I guess there will always be regrets in life, no matter what.

Just the day before the results my parents were talking about what they'd do if I failed every single thing. Guess they too were prepared for the worst, for they were trying to console me as if I did super badly. At that time I was also wondering how'd I be able to face my family the next day for I was sure I would let them down, in some way or other. There wasn't really any anticipation or nervousness then. I was just really afraid of disappointing those around me, afraid of not being able to meet their expectations, especially my family. All along I've been afraid of the high hopes pinned on me, for I was sure I'd disappoint. When my parents say stuff like as long as you've tried your best, it doesn't matter or even if you fail you aren't the 1st one, I know that they are affected and they are disappointed.

As I got back the results, it took awhile before the reality sets in. I was apprehensive as I called my parents, for I was still afraid that I didn't meet their expectations. Then that night when my whole family came down for a celebration, I knew how elated they all were. It was then that I realised, it isn't for my family, it was for me. There's this something that's giving me regrets, regrets that I didn't put in more effort, regrets that I did let them down after all. To me, it just wasn't good enough for them. I felt as though I've disappointed them once again.

I guess human nature is such that one will never be satisfied, one will always be wanting to do better. I wonder if I'm just using my family as an excuse, if I really have such high expectations of myself. I wonder. I have to learn, to be satisfied with whatever I have. There will always be a limit to everything.

The route ahead is tough, filled with ups and downs, but I'll get through it, mark my words. It's gonna be a tiring journey but no matter what, I will never give up.

Dawn/Dusk/Kueh
02081994
Xinmin Secondary

I guess there will always be regrets in life, no matter what.

Just the day before the results my parents were talking about what they'd do if I failed every single thing. Guess they too were prepared for the worst, for they were trying to console me as if I did super badly. At that time I was also wondering how'd I be able to face my family the next day for I was sure I would let them down, in some way or other. There wasn't really any anticipation or nervousness then. I was just really afraid of disappointing those around me, afraid of not being able to meet their expectations, especially my family. All along I've been afraid of the high hopes pinned on me, for I was sure I'd disappoint. When my parents say stuff like as long as you've tried your best, it doesn't matter or even if you fail you aren't the 1st one, I know that they are affected and they are disappointed.

As I got back the results, it took awhile before the reality sets in. I was apprehensive as I called my parents, for I was still afraid that I didn't meet their expectations. Then that night when my whole family came down for a celebration, I knew how elated they all were. It was then that I realised, it isn't for my family, it was for me. There's this something that's giving me regrets, regrets that I didn't put in more effort, regrets that I did let them down after all. To me, it just wasn't good enough for them. I felt as though I've disappointed them once again.

I guess human nature is such that one will never be satisfied, one will always be wanting to do better. I wonder if I'm just using my family as an excuse, if I really have such high expectations of myself. I wonder. I have to learn, to be satisfied with whatever I have. There will always be a limit to everything.

The route ahead is tough, filled with ups and downs, but I'll get through it, mark my words. It's gonna be a tiring journey but no matter what, I will never give up.